In his book Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ (1995), Daniel Goleman argued that emotional intelligence could be just as important, if not even more so, at predicting success in life. He further suggested that people who are successful at work aren’t just smart but also have a strong amount of emotional intelligence.
Emotional intelligence even plays a more important role in the remote work setting. Trainer and consultant Janine Wyborn, in an article in RemoteWorkHub.com, emphasized that EI awareness “should actually be heightened in a remote working environment.” Because even if a team is composed of skilled, high-performing professionals, if every individual can’t identify and manage their own emotions, they won’t be able to solve misunderstandings and conflicts that could be detrimental to their success. Simply put, your emotional intelligence also matters if you’re working virtually.
Here are ways to develop your emotional intelligence and create better relationships:
Experts say self-awareness is the cornerstone of emotional intelligence. Employees with high EI are fully aware of their emotional strengths and weaknesses and recognize how their actions can affect their colleagues. You have to take the time to understand how you are feeling at any given moment and know how these emotions influence how you respond or interact with others. By reflecting on your own emotions, you become much more aware of the roles they play into your life.
Do you get annoyed or frustrated easily? Can you still communicate well with others, even if you’re feeling impatient? Fathom why you’re feeling that way and allow yourself to look for ways to deal with such shortcomings. Remember that emotions tend to be fleeting and what you’re feeling at any given moment is temporary, so don’t make rash decisions that can affect your long-term goals or can be damaging to the company’s reputation.
Emotionally intelligent people are more empathetic. They see things from another's point of view and try to understand how they feel. They step into another person’s shoes, recognize how they are feeling, and think about how to respond in these emotions. Empathy enables employees to build stronger relationships, develop mutual respect, trust, and openness so they can operate better as a team and work together towards achieving their organization’s goals.
It can be challenging at times, especially when you don’t agree with the other person or you feel that what they believe is wrong (especially if it’s your team lead or any higher-ups). By being more empathetic, you look at the situation from another’s perspective rather than letting the disagreements build up and turn into a major conflict.
Self-regulation, according to Goleman, is another critical part of emotional intelligence. It’s being able to manage your emotions so you can adapt well to changing situations. A great way to improve your self-regulation in the workplace is by identifying what stresses you out and then taking proactive steps to have less of it in your life. Is it the emails from work that keep on piling up that hinder you from taking a much-needed rest? Avoid checking it once you’ve arrived home and especially before going to bed.
When things get stressful at work and you’re having a really bad day, keep your cool and accept the fact that you can’t control everything. Don’t rush into making decisions, especially if it will greatly affect your team and company. Take time to think, as emotions can overwhelm you and prevent you from being rational and objective. An emotionally intelligent person thinks about how their emotional expressions affect others so they don’t just react impulsively at the moment.
One of the greatest challenges affecting virtual teams is, undoubtedly, effective communication. Face-to-face conversations are limited, which means you can’t rely on other factors like body language and tone of voice to send out your message. Emotionally intelligent people in the virtual workplace understand that they need to choose their words carefully since emails and chats carry no emotions and may be perceived differently by the recipient. You need to be concise and explain yourself clearly to break any communication deficiencies so there’s less room for misunderstanding.
Aside from being good communicators, people with high EQs also have strong social skills. Employees, managers, and leaders with great social skills are able to communicate their thoughts and ideas effectively. They also make great team players: a skill that is also highly valued in the workplace.
To strengthen your own social skills in the workplace, practice active listening. During phone meetings and video conferences, you can show you are listening by asking questions and providing feedback, and not just passively listening to other people talk. Listening to what others have to say, whatever work you’re in, will show that you regard them with respect and you’re willing to work with others to help reach any goals.
Diversity in the workplace is beautiful and should be celebrated, but it also comes with many challenges. You must learn to be more sensitive to other cultures, as much as other people from other cultures must also be sensitive to yours. If you’re working remotely with a team whose people came from different social, cultural, and economic backgrounds, seek out your cultural differences so you can understand them.
By understanding that others might have different responses and customs based on their upbringing, you can develop your social and emotional intelligence, as well as your cultural competency. It will help you to effectively work with people who may not even share your native language or share the same beliefs or lifestyle as you.
Another key component of emotional intelligence is intrinsic motivation or the behavior that is driven by internal rewards. People who have strong emotional intelligence tend to be more motivated to achieve goals for their own sake and pursue to do things because they are passionate about it.
For remote workers, a key factor for your growth and success is being self-motivated. It can be tough to work in isolation, so internal motivation should always be paramount. Or else, you’ll find yourself having poor self-management skills and underperform in the virtual setting, which could be detrimental to your career. Focus on the aspects of your job that you truly love and enjoy—whether it’s the freedom to work anywhere you want, the highly competitive pay, or the opportunity to help many clients achieve their own goals. Keep in mind that there will always be things about your job that you’ll love as much as you’ll hate. So take inspiration on the things you enjoy doing and focus on the sense of accomplishment you feel every time you complete a new challenge.
Bottom Line
The greatest beauty of emotional intelligence is that it can be applied in all facets of life; it isn’t just an essential skill in the workplace or business. And whether you’re an introvert or an extrovert, it’s actually something that can be learned by having the right mindset and keeping your composure at all times. Easier said than done, right? But there’s no harm in trying to always apply these important principles for you to succeed better in life.